1 00:00:03,737 --> 00:00:05,073 [music playing] 2 00:00:05,173 --> 00:00:07,007 [weedwacker buzzing] 3 00:00:10,778 --> 00:00:11,579 Oh, wow. 4 00:00:11,679 --> 00:00:13,547 Clean T-shirt and imported beer. 5 00:00:13,647 --> 00:00:14,815 What's the occasion, Phil? 6 00:00:14,915 --> 00:00:16,350 - Company's coming. - Oh, yeah? 7 00:00:16,450 --> 00:00:17,418 Health inspector? 8 00:00:17,518 --> 00:00:19,487 Actually, a charming pair of newlyweds. 9 00:00:19,587 --> 00:00:21,522 I hope you don't mean Tom and Jessie. 10 00:00:21,622 --> 00:00:23,791 Because it's our turn to host Sunday dinner. 11 00:00:23,891 --> 00:00:26,460 When did this turn system start anyway? 12 00:00:26,560 --> 00:00:27,361 It's fair. 13 00:00:27,461 --> 00:00:28,262 And balanced. 14 00:00:28,362 --> 00:00:29,497 And wrong. 15 00:00:29,597 --> 00:00:31,332 We should get the kids three Sundays a month, seeing 16 00:00:31,432 --> 00:00:32,533 as they live in your attic. 17 00:00:32,633 --> 00:00:34,568 Well, they might have lived in your attic if it 18 00:00:34,668 --> 00:00:38,939 wasn't filled with unsold copies of your self-published memoir. 19 00:00:39,039 --> 00:00:42,310 I say, governor, doesn't that look smashing? 20 00:00:42,410 --> 00:00:43,944 I think I'll buy one for my mum. 21 00:00:44,044 --> 00:00:46,414 I know it's you, honey. 22 00:00:46,514 --> 00:00:48,582 And while we're at it, I want my drill back. 23 00:00:48,682 --> 00:00:50,017 What does that have to do with anything? 24 00:00:50,118 --> 00:00:51,352 Oh, it has to do with everything. 25 00:00:51,452 --> 00:00:53,821 For the billionth time, Ben, I gave you back the drill. 26 00:00:53,921 --> 00:00:55,323 For the billionth time, I-- 27 00:00:55,423 --> 00:00:56,390 You know what? 28 00:00:56,490 --> 00:00:58,459 Why don't we just compromise, all right? 29 00:00:58,559 --> 00:01:00,994 Tom and Jessie will be having dinner with us tonight. 30 00:01:01,095 --> 00:01:01,962 Fine. 31 00:01:02,062 --> 00:01:04,064 That is not a compromise, Judith. 32 00:01:04,165 --> 00:01:07,435 That is you getting exactly what you want. 33 00:01:07,535 --> 00:01:11,772 After we listened patiently and decided that's what's best. 34 00:01:11,872 --> 00:01:13,374 Here's a thought. 35 00:01:13,474 --> 00:01:16,577 What if we host Sunday dinner for both sets of parents? 36 00:01:16,677 --> 00:01:17,478 We don't cook. 37 00:01:17,578 --> 00:01:18,679 That's a technicality. 38 00:01:18,779 --> 00:01:20,548 We'll break a little bread, make a little peace. 39 00:01:20,648 --> 00:01:21,782 Get down tonight. 40 00:01:21,882 --> 00:01:22,683 What? 41 00:01:22,783 --> 00:01:24,852 Are you forty? 42 00:01:24,952 --> 00:01:26,187 [theme music] 43 00:01:26,287 --> 00:01:33,261 THEME SONG: Can't we find a way that we can be together? 44 00:01:33,361 --> 00:01:37,698 Is there any way that we can be together? 45 00:01:37,798 --> 00:01:42,603 And oh by the way, baby, do you love me? 46 00:01:42,703 --> 00:01:43,604 Yes, I do. 47 00:01:43,704 --> 00:01:44,505 Yes, I do. 48 00:01:44,605 --> 00:01:47,040 Yes, I do. 49 00:01:47,141 --> 00:01:48,041 Yes, I do. 50 00:01:55,048 --> 00:01:57,017 We have to tell everyone what time to come over. 51 00:01:57,117 --> 00:01:57,985 I'm on it. 52 00:01:58,085 --> 00:01:58,886 All right. 53 00:01:58,986 --> 00:02:00,087 Let's talk menu. 54 00:02:00,188 --> 00:02:01,389 Microwave. 55 00:02:01,489 --> 00:02:02,523 That's not food. 56 00:02:02,623 --> 00:02:03,424 No. 57 00:02:03,524 --> 00:02:04,692 But it's where food comes from. 58 00:02:04,792 --> 00:02:07,661 It's time we explore our culinary boundaries, Jess. 59 00:02:07,761 --> 00:02:09,397 The microwave is the boundary. 60 00:02:09,497 --> 00:02:10,664 Not anymore. 61 00:02:10,764 --> 00:02:12,132 Tonight, we turn on the stove. 62 00:02:12,233 --> 00:02:13,367 Well, if we're turning on the stove, 63 00:02:13,467 --> 00:02:15,603 I know a nice, simple recipe for vegetarian chili. 64 00:02:15,703 --> 00:02:16,637 Oh, good. 65 00:02:16,737 --> 00:02:18,539 My father and tofu, together at last. 66 00:02:18,639 --> 00:02:19,607 No tofu. 67 00:02:19,707 --> 00:02:20,808 I just need you to pick up kidney beans. 68 00:02:20,908 --> 00:02:22,176 And where are you going? 69 00:02:22,276 --> 00:02:24,978 I'm on atmosphere-- candles, tablecloth, chewing gum. 70 00:02:25,078 --> 00:02:26,214 - Chewing gum? - Yeah. 71 00:02:26,314 --> 00:02:27,815 Our roof leaks, and they're calling for rain. 72 00:02:36,857 --> 00:02:38,759 Cushion's been misbehaving? 73 00:02:38,859 --> 00:02:40,361 Thunderstorm coming. 74 00:02:40,461 --> 00:02:43,297 Low pressure systems bring out the worst in me. 75 00:02:43,397 --> 00:02:47,134 Maybe you should move to a drier climate, like Mars. 76 00:02:47,235 --> 00:02:49,270 You know, in the interest of our children, 77 00:02:49,370 --> 00:02:51,272 it'd be nice if we could put aside our differences 78 00:02:51,372 --> 00:02:52,740 for this dinner. 79 00:02:52,840 --> 00:02:56,109 For one night, why don't we try to act like-- 80 00:02:56,210 --> 00:02:57,110 Old friends. 81 00:02:57,211 --> 00:02:58,279 Acquaintances. 82 00:02:58,379 --> 00:02:59,547 Former work colleagues. 83 00:02:59,647 --> 00:03:00,448 That'll do. 84 00:03:07,688 --> 00:03:08,489 Hey. 85 00:03:08,589 --> 00:03:09,557 I'm back. 86 00:03:09,657 --> 00:03:10,758 You get the word out? 87 00:03:10,858 --> 00:03:14,061 They're coming at 7:00. What is all that stuff? 88 00:03:14,161 --> 00:03:15,463 I just asked you to get kidney beans. 89 00:03:15,563 --> 00:03:16,897 I know. But I got inspired. 90 00:03:16,997 --> 00:03:18,299 Oh, no. 91 00:03:18,399 --> 00:03:19,833 One word. 92 00:03:19,933 --> 00:03:21,068 Ratatouille, hmm? 93 00:03:21,168 --> 00:03:23,671 Tom, why do you always have to do everything 94 00:03:23,771 --> 00:03:24,705 that you see in movies? 95 00:03:24,805 --> 00:03:25,973 We watched "Pretty Woman" last night. 96 00:03:26,073 --> 00:03:27,341 And you don't see me all, hey, I think 97 00:03:27,441 --> 00:03:28,409 I'll try that hooker thing. 98 00:03:28,509 --> 00:03:29,710 Jessie, look. 99 00:03:29,810 --> 00:03:31,379 This isn't just a dinner party. 100 00:03:31,479 --> 00:03:32,446 It's a peace summit. 101 00:03:32,546 --> 00:03:33,614 It calls for spectacle. 102 00:03:33,714 --> 00:03:34,548 It calls for risk. 103 00:03:34,648 --> 00:03:35,549 It calls for-- 104 00:03:35,649 --> 00:03:37,084 A cartoon rat tugging on your hair. 105 00:03:37,184 --> 00:03:38,051 I can do this. 106 00:03:38,151 --> 00:03:40,120 I've made it before. 107 00:03:40,220 --> 00:03:41,822 Well, I watched my mom make it. 108 00:03:41,922 --> 00:03:42,823 OK. 109 00:03:42,923 --> 00:03:45,225 I was in the room when she made it. 110 00:03:45,326 --> 00:03:46,294 I ate it. 111 00:03:46,394 --> 00:03:48,095 But what's wrong with vegetarian chili? 112 00:03:48,195 --> 00:03:49,497 It's boring. 113 00:03:49,597 --> 00:03:52,199 You think they serve vegetarian chili at the Geneva Convention? 114 00:03:52,300 --> 00:03:53,100 Why not? 115 00:03:53,200 --> 00:03:54,034 It's tasty. 116 00:03:54,134 --> 00:03:55,469 It's simple, politically neutral. 117 00:03:55,569 --> 00:03:56,370 Yeah. 118 00:03:56,470 --> 00:03:58,205 But we don't wanna be neutral. 119 00:03:58,306 --> 00:04:00,107 We wanna change hearts and minds here. 120 00:04:00,207 --> 00:04:01,875 With eggplant? 121 00:04:01,975 --> 00:04:02,910 Trust me. 122 00:04:03,010 --> 00:04:04,612 Nothing's gonna go wrong. 123 00:04:04,712 --> 00:04:06,580 [suspenseful ringtone] 124 00:04:06,680 --> 00:04:08,516 You really have to change that ringtone. 125 00:04:11,218 --> 00:04:12,052 Fair and balanced. 126 00:04:12,152 --> 00:04:14,522 I'll give them fair and balanced. 127 00:04:14,622 --> 00:04:16,123 What does that mean? 128 00:04:16,223 --> 00:04:17,190 I don't know. 129 00:04:17,291 --> 00:04:19,026 I thought it sounded kind of threatening. 130 00:04:19,126 --> 00:04:20,361 No good? 131 00:04:20,461 --> 00:04:21,462 It's fine. 132 00:04:21,562 --> 00:04:23,697 But I already talked to Judith earlier on. 133 00:04:23,797 --> 00:04:26,066 And we both agreed that it would be best if we 134 00:04:26,166 --> 00:04:28,168 all tried to get along tonight. 135 00:04:28,268 --> 00:04:29,937 But I was working on this whole coiled rage, 136 00:04:30,037 --> 00:04:33,206 don't mess with me thing. 137 00:04:33,307 --> 00:04:37,244 Well, you just keep that in your back pocket, bad boy. 138 00:04:37,345 --> 00:04:39,713 And later, we'll play angry prison guard. 139 00:04:39,813 --> 00:04:42,115 Again? 140 00:04:42,215 --> 00:04:44,785 Ben, I want you on your best behavior tonight. 141 00:04:44,885 --> 00:04:46,754 This dinner is very important to Tom and Jessie. 142 00:04:46,854 --> 00:04:47,655 What? 143 00:04:47,755 --> 00:04:49,323 I'm always on my best behavior. 144 00:04:49,423 --> 00:04:51,058 It's Phil who's the troublemaker. 145 00:04:51,158 --> 00:04:53,193 Then why don't you show Phil that you 146 00:04:53,293 --> 00:04:56,029 are the better man, hmm? 147 00:04:56,129 --> 00:05:00,868 And bring him a little peace offering. 148 00:05:00,968 --> 00:05:02,503 Good God, woman, not the Bordeaux. 149 00:05:02,603 --> 00:05:04,071 Might as well give him my still beating heart. 150 00:05:07,274 --> 00:05:08,075 Yeah, yeah. 151 00:05:08,175 --> 00:05:09,710 There we go. 152 00:05:09,810 --> 00:05:11,044 That's more Phil's speed right there. 153 00:05:11,144 --> 00:05:12,980 That is cooking wine. 154 00:05:13,080 --> 00:05:13,847 Indeed it is. 155 00:05:21,555 --> 00:05:22,523 Hide the jerky, Phil. 156 00:05:22,623 --> 00:05:24,324 Wife's coming. 157 00:05:24,425 --> 00:05:25,225 Relax. 158 00:05:25,325 --> 00:05:26,126 Just kidding. 159 00:05:26,226 --> 00:05:27,928 What do you want, Ben? 160 00:05:28,028 --> 00:05:30,698 Actually, in honor of tonight, I come bearing 161 00:05:30,798 --> 00:05:33,634 a peace offering for you. 162 00:05:33,734 --> 00:05:34,535 Oh, wow. 163 00:05:34,635 --> 00:05:35,869 Thanks, dude. 164 00:05:35,969 --> 00:05:37,871 Someone has to be the better man. 165 00:05:37,971 --> 00:05:40,974 As a matter of fact, I got a peace offering for you myself. 166 00:05:43,711 --> 00:05:44,512 Hope it's good. 167 00:05:44,612 --> 00:05:45,613 I don't know much about wine. 168 00:05:45,713 --> 00:05:47,347 But my vintner called this bad boy-- 169 00:05:47,448 --> 00:05:48,749 Oh, stop it. 170 00:05:48,849 --> 00:05:50,150 You didn't buy this for me. 171 00:05:50,250 --> 00:05:51,885 You just grabbed whatever was handy over there to show me up. 172 00:05:51,985 --> 00:05:52,786 Wow. 173 00:05:52,886 --> 00:05:54,655 That's quite an accusation, Ben. 174 00:05:54,755 --> 00:05:56,590 You sure someone's nose isn't out of joint 175 00:05:56,690 --> 00:05:59,593 because his neighbor just outclassed him? 176 00:05:59,693 --> 00:06:02,463 Nobody outclasses me, least of all you. 177 00:06:02,563 --> 00:06:03,497 I've got class on a stick. 178 00:06:03,597 --> 00:06:04,398 Oh. 179 00:06:04,498 --> 00:06:05,733 So that's what's up your ass. 180 00:06:10,904 --> 00:06:12,305 Tom, you didn't measure that chicken stock. 181 00:06:12,406 --> 00:06:13,941 Epicurious says a 3/4 cup. 182 00:06:14,041 --> 00:06:15,208 Well, we don't have a measuring cup. 183 00:06:15,308 --> 00:06:16,877 So I eyeballed it. 184 00:06:16,977 --> 00:06:18,612 We have a measuring cup right here. 185 00:06:18,712 --> 00:06:19,513 Eh. 186 00:06:19,613 --> 00:06:20,548 What's done is done. 187 00:06:20,648 --> 00:06:22,215 And why are you adding the parsley now? 188 00:06:22,315 --> 00:06:23,917 You're supposed to wait till the end. 189 00:06:24,017 --> 00:06:25,185 Jessie. 190 00:06:25,285 --> 00:06:26,554 I'm sorry. 191 00:06:26,654 --> 00:06:28,221 It's just we had a plan, and you're deviating from the plan. 192 00:06:28,321 --> 00:06:29,523 And you shouldn't deviate from the plan 193 00:06:29,623 --> 00:06:30,791 because if you deviate from the plan, 194 00:06:30,891 --> 00:06:32,325 you might as well not even make a plan to begin with. 195 00:06:32,426 --> 00:06:34,061 Exactly. Now you're speaking my language. 196 00:06:34,161 --> 00:06:35,328 I don't want to speak your language. 197 00:06:38,732 --> 00:06:41,669 Who was the king of eighth grade home ec class, hmm? 198 00:06:41,769 --> 00:06:42,970 You're still clinging to that, huh? 199 00:06:43,070 --> 00:06:43,837 Look. 200 00:06:43,937 --> 00:06:44,938 Everything's gonna go great. 201 00:06:45,038 --> 00:06:46,507 Our parents are gonna love the meal. 202 00:06:46,607 --> 00:06:49,142 And then they're gonna love each other. 203 00:06:49,242 --> 00:06:50,143 Ew. 204 00:06:50,243 --> 00:06:51,278 - That came out wrong. - You're right. 205 00:06:51,378 --> 00:06:52,179 I'll set the table. 206 00:07:03,090 --> 00:07:04,492 Are you OK? 207 00:07:04,592 --> 00:07:07,060 I'm just annoyed we have to share Jessie tonight. 208 00:07:07,160 --> 00:07:09,963 I was looking forward to seeing her sans Mr. Tightass. 209 00:07:10,063 --> 00:07:11,532 (IN RUSSIAN ACCENT) Forget the prison guard. 210 00:07:11,632 --> 00:07:16,637 Perhaps I can cheer up my rich Western husband, eh? 211 00:07:16,737 --> 00:07:18,138 Oh. 212 00:07:18,238 --> 00:07:20,941 My Russian mail-order bride has arrived. 213 00:07:21,041 --> 00:07:23,276 (IN RUSSIAN ACCENT) You will buy me many, many diamonds 214 00:07:23,376 --> 00:07:25,979 and blue jeans. - OK. 215 00:07:26,079 --> 00:07:27,147 I got something for you here, Phil. 216 00:07:27,247 --> 00:07:28,348 Excuse me, Tara. 217 00:07:28,448 --> 00:07:29,817 You'll notice that this is a slightly older vintage 218 00:07:29,917 --> 00:07:32,119 than the one that you gave me. 219 00:07:32,219 --> 00:07:34,354 It's-- why is Tara wearing a fur coat and no shoes? 220 00:07:34,454 --> 00:07:36,423 First of all, it's a faux fur. 221 00:07:36,524 --> 00:07:39,560 Second of all, it was about to come off. 222 00:07:39,660 --> 00:07:40,961 Oh, oh, oh, oh. 223 00:07:41,061 --> 00:07:43,330 Pardon me for not anticipating sexual depravity in the garage. 224 00:07:43,430 --> 00:07:44,231 You might have knocked. 225 00:07:44,331 --> 00:07:45,265 The door was open. 226 00:07:45,365 --> 00:07:46,466 There's a reason for that. 227 00:07:46,567 --> 00:07:47,367 What? 228 00:07:47,467 --> 00:07:48,769 So the mailman could join in? 229 00:07:48,869 --> 00:07:50,771 That's a '98 though. 230 00:07:50,871 --> 00:07:51,772 Hmm. 231 00:07:54,107 --> 00:07:54,908 Whoa. 232 00:07:55,008 --> 00:07:58,178 Storms a-coming, Pa. 233 00:07:58,278 --> 00:08:00,147 Let's see here. 234 00:08:00,247 --> 00:08:01,815 Music, classical. 235 00:08:01,915 --> 00:08:03,617 Flowers organic. 236 00:08:03,717 --> 00:08:06,453 China, eclectic. 237 00:08:06,554 --> 00:08:08,188 Tom, how's it going? 238 00:08:08,288 --> 00:08:11,258 Well, to be honest, I've hit a bit of a snag. 239 00:08:11,358 --> 00:08:12,259 You don't say. 240 00:08:12,359 --> 00:08:13,827 Well, we don't have any fresh basil. 241 00:08:13,927 --> 00:08:16,229 But I have come up with a blend of herbs and spices 242 00:08:16,329 --> 00:08:18,498 that's gonna give it its own unique flavor. 243 00:08:18,599 --> 00:08:20,267 OK, Colonel Sanders. 244 00:08:20,367 --> 00:08:21,368 I gave your plan a shot. 245 00:08:21,468 --> 00:08:23,036 But we can't afford to screw up this time. 246 00:08:23,136 --> 00:08:24,104 What do you mean this time? 247 00:08:24,204 --> 00:08:28,609 I mean choose your appetizers. 248 00:08:28,709 --> 00:08:29,509 China Dragon? 249 00:08:29,610 --> 00:08:30,410 You've gotta be kidding. 250 00:08:30,510 --> 00:08:31,344 Tom, don't get me wrong. 251 00:08:31,444 --> 00:08:33,513 I love your ambition. - But-- 252 00:08:33,614 --> 00:08:37,450 But sometimes it exceeds your ability. 253 00:08:37,551 --> 00:08:39,019 Really? How so? 254 00:08:39,119 --> 00:08:40,120 Well, let's see. 255 00:08:40,220 --> 00:08:42,355 Normal kids have treehouses. 256 00:08:42,455 --> 00:08:45,525 You tried to build a tree castle. 257 00:08:45,626 --> 00:08:48,295 I'm not so sure about this, Tom. 258 00:08:48,395 --> 00:08:50,698 [gasping] 259 00:08:50,798 --> 00:08:52,532 I meant to do that. 260 00:08:55,135 --> 00:08:56,937 I didn't realize you'd been cataloging my failures. 261 00:08:57,037 --> 00:08:57,938 No. 262 00:08:58,038 --> 00:08:59,272 But every time you fall a bit short, 263 00:08:59,372 --> 00:09:02,175 I am more than happy to help pick up the pieces. 264 00:09:02,275 --> 00:09:03,276 That came out wrong. 265 00:09:03,376 --> 00:09:04,912 Serving takeout at our first dinner party 266 00:09:05,012 --> 00:09:08,782 might be acceptable to you, but not to me. 267 00:09:08,882 --> 00:09:12,019 Feel free to pick up the pieces. 268 00:09:12,119 --> 00:09:13,987 No problem. 269 00:09:14,087 --> 00:09:15,022 I'm making my chili. 270 00:09:15,122 --> 00:09:16,590 Well, I'm still making my ratatouille. 271 00:09:16,690 --> 00:09:18,491 God, you're stubborn. 272 00:09:18,592 --> 00:09:19,459 I'm stubborn? 273 00:09:19,559 --> 00:09:20,728 You're the one insisting on getting 274 00:09:20,828 --> 00:09:22,095 the kids three Sundays a month. 275 00:09:22,195 --> 00:09:24,031 I think it's pretty clear they prefer our company. 276 00:09:24,131 --> 00:09:25,766 Oh, yes, absolutely. 277 00:09:25,866 --> 00:09:27,067 Why, just yesterday Tom was going 278 00:09:27,167 --> 00:09:29,703 on about your tofu quin-o-a or whatever the heck passes 279 00:09:29,803 --> 00:09:30,971 for dinner with you people. 280 00:09:31,071 --> 00:09:33,874 Tofu and quinoa have nothing to do with each other. 281 00:09:33,974 --> 00:09:35,475 Oh, there's a useful piece of information. 282 00:09:35,575 --> 00:09:37,845 Thank you for that. [thunder rumbling] 283 00:09:39,913 --> 00:09:40,781 Great job, Phil. 284 00:09:40,881 --> 00:09:41,849 Now the power's out. 285 00:09:41,949 --> 00:09:43,651 How can you blame a bolt of lightning on me? 286 00:09:43,751 --> 00:09:47,454 Give me five minutes. I'll find a way. 287 00:09:47,554 --> 00:09:48,421 Ah. 288 00:09:48,521 --> 00:09:49,322 Nothing. 289 00:09:49,422 --> 00:09:50,423 Whole house is down. 290 00:09:50,523 --> 00:09:51,792 Good thing we have a gas stove. 291 00:09:51,892 --> 00:09:56,964 Good thing my recipe's all up here and not on some computer. 292 00:09:57,064 --> 00:09:59,032 Good thing my computer has a battery. 293 00:09:59,132 --> 00:10:01,568 I'll just transcribe the recipe before it-- 294 00:10:01,669 --> 00:10:02,803 dies out. 295 00:10:02,903 --> 00:10:04,537 Oh, that's gotta hurt. 296 00:10:04,638 --> 00:10:08,441 What are you gonna do without your precious recipe? 297 00:10:08,541 --> 00:10:12,012 You think I can't roll with the punches? 298 00:10:12,112 --> 00:10:13,346 You think I can't-- 299 00:10:13,446 --> 00:10:14,948 [snapping] 300 00:10:15,048 --> 00:10:15,849 Improvise. 301 00:10:15,949 --> 00:10:18,251 I would have gotten it. 302 00:10:18,351 --> 00:10:20,620 And that, Phil, is why the bolt of lightning 303 00:10:20,721 --> 00:10:21,588 was all your fault. 304 00:10:21,689 --> 00:10:22,723 I can't believe it. 305 00:10:22,823 --> 00:10:24,257 He found a way. 306 00:10:24,357 --> 00:10:27,194 Phew. 307 00:10:27,294 --> 00:10:28,762 The power just went out. 308 00:10:28,862 --> 00:10:29,830 Was it Phil? - Yeah. 309 00:10:29,930 --> 00:10:30,731 Come on. 310 00:10:30,831 --> 00:10:31,699 Let's go. 311 00:10:31,799 --> 00:10:33,066 My work here is done. - Oh, yeah. 312 00:10:33,166 --> 00:10:34,001 The doorknob's stripped. 313 00:10:34,101 --> 00:10:35,769 I keep on meaning to get to that. 314 00:10:35,869 --> 00:10:37,037 You could have just used my drill. 315 00:10:37,137 --> 00:10:38,438 Enough already with the drill. 316 00:10:38,538 --> 00:10:40,941 Let's just open the garage door and get out of here. 317 00:10:41,041 --> 00:10:43,911 - Uh it's electric. - OK. 318 00:10:44,011 --> 00:10:46,046 Please tell us we're not stuck in here. 319 00:10:46,146 --> 00:10:47,447 OK. 320 00:10:47,547 --> 00:10:49,449 I'll keep quiet and let you come to that conclusion on your own. 321 00:10:49,549 --> 00:10:51,451 [thunder rumbling] 322 00:10:59,659 --> 00:11:00,460 Hold on. 323 00:11:00,560 --> 00:11:01,929 I've got a bar. 324 00:11:02,029 --> 00:11:02,830 Ugh. 325 00:11:02,930 --> 00:11:04,131 It's gone. 326 00:11:04,231 --> 00:11:07,234 Nothing here either. 327 00:11:07,334 --> 00:11:08,401 I'm hot. 328 00:11:08,501 --> 00:11:10,838 No need to brag there. 329 00:11:10,938 --> 00:11:14,074 Maybe those windows open up, huh? 330 00:11:14,174 --> 00:11:16,109 I say let's smash them. 331 00:11:16,209 --> 00:11:17,110 Not a chance. 332 00:11:17,210 --> 00:11:18,311 No one's smashing anything. 333 00:11:18,411 --> 00:11:19,913 The power will come on soon enough. 334 00:11:20,013 --> 00:11:21,949 Everyone just take a pill. 335 00:11:22,049 --> 00:11:24,584 Bet that's your answer to everything. 336 00:11:24,684 --> 00:11:26,119 God, now I'm starving. 337 00:11:26,219 --> 00:11:28,688 It's too bad this is a strictly vegetarian household, right? 338 00:11:28,789 --> 00:11:30,758 Otherwise, there'd be meat products stashed 339 00:11:30,858 --> 00:11:31,825 away somewhere, wouldn't there? 340 00:11:31,925 --> 00:11:32,726 I don't know. 341 00:11:32,826 --> 00:11:35,662 Somewhere, maybe here. 342 00:11:35,763 --> 00:11:37,464 Brownies. 343 00:11:37,564 --> 00:11:40,433 Not what you were expecting, Ben? 344 00:11:40,533 --> 00:11:42,169 No. 345 00:11:42,269 --> 00:11:43,103 But they'll do. 346 00:11:43,203 --> 00:11:46,339 Um Ben, those are Phil's brownies. 347 00:11:46,439 --> 00:11:47,207 So? 348 00:11:50,911 --> 00:11:52,612 Oh, good God. 349 00:11:52,712 --> 00:11:55,415 You know, I think this was fate. 350 00:11:55,515 --> 00:12:00,320 Four people, four brownies, a ton of negative energy. 351 00:12:00,420 --> 00:12:02,722 I think we should all just have one. 352 00:12:02,823 --> 00:12:04,591 - Not a chance. - Come on. 353 00:12:04,691 --> 00:12:06,059 Why are you guys so uptight? 354 00:12:06,159 --> 00:12:10,163 Because, Phil, we try to set a good example for our children. 355 00:12:10,263 --> 00:12:11,999 That is the difference between you and us. 356 00:12:12,099 --> 00:12:14,001 Not the only difference, I hope. 357 00:12:14,101 --> 00:12:15,668 Ugh. Oh. 358 00:12:15,769 --> 00:12:16,603 Isn't that your refugee? 359 00:12:16,703 --> 00:12:18,071 Oh. 360 00:12:18,171 --> 00:12:19,539 Hello? 361 00:12:19,639 --> 00:12:20,974 Hello. 362 00:12:21,074 --> 00:12:22,442 We're here. 363 00:12:22,542 --> 00:12:23,410 Hello? 364 00:12:23,510 --> 00:12:24,377 Why can't he hear us? 365 00:12:24,477 --> 00:12:25,779 His lips are moving. 366 00:12:25,879 --> 00:12:28,281 Oh, he's likely in deep prayer. 367 00:12:28,381 --> 00:12:31,518 You know, he comes from a very ancient and spiritual culture. 368 00:12:31,618 --> 00:12:33,486 And one more thing, Marty. 369 00:12:33,586 --> 00:12:36,356 This mutual fund you got me into is a fool's game. 370 00:12:36,456 --> 00:12:38,792 I need you to liquidate the sucker. 371 00:12:38,892 --> 00:12:39,759 Hey. 372 00:12:39,860 --> 00:12:40,693 Hey. 373 00:12:40,794 --> 00:12:41,628 Hello. 374 00:12:41,728 --> 00:12:42,595 In here. 375 00:12:42,695 --> 00:12:44,965 Hello? 376 00:12:45,065 --> 00:12:48,468 Why are you taking up three burners with boiling water? 377 00:12:48,568 --> 00:12:50,603 It's a complicated recipe. 378 00:12:50,703 --> 00:12:52,739 Hey, have you seen the can opener? 379 00:12:52,840 --> 00:12:53,640 Oh. 380 00:12:53,740 --> 00:12:55,575 You mean this can opener? 381 00:12:55,675 --> 00:12:57,845 I'm still working on the tomatoes. 382 00:12:57,945 --> 00:12:59,813 Boy, this is tough. 383 00:12:59,913 --> 00:13:00,981 Could take a while. 384 00:13:01,081 --> 00:13:03,917 You know, all the great chefs like 385 00:13:04,017 --> 00:13:07,387 to personalize their dishes, add that special ingredient 386 00:13:07,487 --> 00:13:08,588 to make it their own. 387 00:13:08,688 --> 00:13:09,689 You wouldn't. 388 00:13:09,789 --> 00:13:11,191 There are no kidney beans in ratatouille. 389 00:13:11,291 --> 00:13:12,459 Well, there are now. 390 00:13:12,559 --> 00:13:13,460 Ugh. 391 00:13:19,432 --> 00:13:21,301 Ugh. 392 00:13:21,401 --> 00:13:22,936 I am sweltering under this thing. 393 00:13:23,036 --> 00:13:26,874 Would either of you really mind if I got naked? 394 00:13:26,974 --> 00:13:27,774 Uh, yeah, we would mind. 395 00:13:27,875 --> 00:13:28,675 Yeah, yeah. 396 00:13:28,775 --> 00:13:29,910 Please remain clothed. 397 00:13:30,010 --> 00:13:30,810 Ugh. 398 00:13:30,911 --> 00:13:31,912 Give it up, Ben. 399 00:13:32,012 --> 00:13:34,181 Why don't you just come and join the circle? 400 00:13:34,281 --> 00:13:35,248 The circle? 401 00:13:35,348 --> 00:13:36,149 OK. 402 00:13:36,249 --> 00:13:37,184 Work with me here, Judith. 403 00:13:37,284 --> 00:13:39,052 Would anyone like to air a grievance? 404 00:13:39,152 --> 00:13:40,120 Yeah. 405 00:13:40,220 --> 00:13:42,422 Yeah, I'd like to air a grievance, yeah. 406 00:13:42,522 --> 00:13:45,258 My particular grievance concerns a certain power tool 407 00:13:45,358 --> 00:13:47,394 that rhymes with Phil and kill. 408 00:13:47,494 --> 00:13:49,062 Why are you so obsessed with that drill? 409 00:13:49,162 --> 00:13:50,330 You already bought a new one. 410 00:13:50,430 --> 00:13:51,999 I'm not obsessed with the drill. 411 00:13:52,099 --> 00:13:54,134 I merely want my property back. 412 00:13:54,234 --> 00:13:58,605 Ben, what does this particular drill represent to you? 413 00:13:58,705 --> 00:14:00,207 $89.99 at Home Depot. 414 00:14:00,307 --> 00:14:01,341 Oh, come on, Ben. 415 00:14:01,441 --> 00:14:02,742 Dig deeper. 416 00:14:02,842 --> 00:14:05,913 Why don't you take us back to the root of the incident, OK? 417 00:14:06,013 --> 00:14:07,915 Fine. 418 00:14:08,015 --> 00:14:10,617 Last time I saw that drill was 12 years ago. 419 00:14:10,717 --> 00:14:11,985 I was building a fence. 420 00:14:12,085 --> 00:14:13,954 Just as I was about to drill in the last board-- 421 00:14:14,054 --> 00:14:15,288 Bob? Hey, Bob. 422 00:14:15,388 --> 00:14:16,323 Bob? Bob? 423 00:14:16,423 --> 00:14:17,224 Bob? Bob? 424 00:14:17,324 --> 00:14:19,326 It's Ben. What's up? 425 00:14:19,426 --> 00:14:20,693 New development in the Lewinsky scandal? 426 00:14:20,793 --> 00:14:21,694 No. 427 00:14:21,794 --> 00:14:23,063 - Microsoft release Windows 98? - No. 428 00:14:23,163 --> 00:14:24,131 - Mark McGwire-- - No. 429 00:14:24,231 --> 00:14:25,132 I need to borrow your drill. 430 00:14:25,232 --> 00:14:26,033 It's an emergency. 431 00:14:26,133 --> 00:14:27,935 Ah. 432 00:14:28,035 --> 00:14:29,269 Thanks, Brad. 433 00:14:29,369 --> 00:14:30,170 It's Ben. 434 00:14:30,270 --> 00:14:33,206 And I need that back. 435 00:14:33,306 --> 00:14:34,107 Oh, yeah. 436 00:14:34,207 --> 00:14:35,242 I remember that now. 437 00:14:35,342 --> 00:14:37,710 I needed it to hang that picture. 438 00:14:37,810 --> 00:14:38,979 Uh-huh. 439 00:14:39,079 --> 00:14:41,814 Because of that, I never got to finish the fence, which 440 00:14:41,915 --> 00:14:44,684 led to the loose board, which led to Tom and Jessie 441 00:14:44,784 --> 00:14:46,819 talking through the gap, and falling in love, 442 00:14:46,920 --> 00:14:50,958 and getting married at 18, and then fights over Sunday dinner, 443 00:14:51,058 --> 00:14:53,593 and then me coming over to this godforsaken garage 444 00:14:53,693 --> 00:14:55,228 with a bottle of our best Bordeaux, 445 00:14:55,328 --> 00:14:58,665 and then us all being stuck in here 446 00:14:58,765 --> 00:15:01,101 together for the entire damn day. 447 00:15:04,604 --> 00:15:07,607 And that, Phil, that's why I'm so 448 00:15:07,707 --> 00:15:09,342 obsessed with the stupid drill. 449 00:15:12,679 --> 00:15:14,614 I'm sorry. 450 00:15:14,714 --> 00:15:16,849 I didn't know you were mentally ill. 451 00:15:16,950 --> 00:15:17,784 See? 452 00:15:17,884 --> 00:15:20,387 Waste of time. 453 00:15:20,487 --> 00:15:22,289 - Ben. - What? 454 00:15:22,389 --> 00:15:25,692 The kids didn't get married because of a gap in the fence. 455 00:15:25,792 --> 00:15:27,927 They did it because they love each other. 456 00:15:28,028 --> 00:15:30,530 Here comes Dr. Tara. 457 00:15:30,630 --> 00:15:32,765 Whether we like it or not, we're family now. 458 00:15:32,865 --> 00:15:36,970 So less mocking, more talking. 459 00:15:37,070 --> 00:15:40,140 Someone's been reading too many Starbucks cups. 460 00:15:40,240 --> 00:15:41,608 [laughter] 461 00:15:41,708 --> 00:15:42,609 Good one, dear. 462 00:15:42,709 --> 00:15:44,011 Thank you, dear. 463 00:15:44,111 --> 00:15:46,746 If we were family, there'd be fewer secrets, wouldn't there? 464 00:15:46,846 --> 00:15:48,982 Such as the location of a certain protein product, huh, 465 00:15:49,082 --> 00:15:50,217 Phil? 466 00:15:50,317 --> 00:15:51,651 Where is that, Phil? Where is the protein product? 467 00:15:51,751 --> 00:15:53,053 What are you talking about? What is he talking about? 468 00:15:53,153 --> 00:15:54,087 Come on. Where is it? 469 00:15:54,187 --> 00:15:55,322 Up here, huh? Here? 470 00:15:55,422 --> 00:15:56,323 - Dude, no. - Up here? 471 00:15:56,423 --> 00:15:57,924 [crashing] 472 00:16:01,394 --> 00:16:04,131 Ugh. 473 00:16:04,231 --> 00:16:05,032 Ah, hey, come on. 474 00:16:05,132 --> 00:16:06,299 It's a drill. 475 00:16:06,399 --> 00:16:08,668 It doesn't mean it's the drill. 476 00:16:13,340 --> 00:16:15,375 Property of Benjamin Bellow. 477 00:16:20,247 --> 00:16:21,348 Mine's ready. 478 00:16:21,448 --> 00:16:22,782 Yours? 479 00:16:22,882 --> 00:16:23,683 Ready. 480 00:16:27,020 --> 00:16:28,455 [coughing] 481 00:16:31,058 --> 00:16:33,326 Could be an acquired taste. 482 00:16:33,426 --> 00:16:34,227 Don't patronize me. 483 00:16:34,327 --> 00:16:35,862 It's awful. 484 00:16:35,962 --> 00:16:38,965 Then again, I didn't have beans. 485 00:16:39,066 --> 00:16:39,866 Let's try mine. 486 00:16:43,103 --> 00:16:44,637 Not bad. 487 00:16:44,737 --> 00:16:46,373 If you like it watery. 488 00:16:46,473 --> 00:16:47,540 Fine. 489 00:16:47,640 --> 00:16:48,608 I'll let it reduce. 490 00:16:48,708 --> 00:16:50,210 - Any other comments? - It's brilliant. 491 00:16:50,310 --> 00:16:51,111 OK? 492 00:16:51,211 --> 00:16:52,279 Is that what you want to hear? 493 00:16:52,379 --> 00:16:53,280 You were right. I was wrong. 494 00:16:53,380 --> 00:16:54,681 I'm too rigid. You're awesome. 495 00:16:54,781 --> 00:16:55,582 You win. 496 00:16:59,452 --> 00:17:01,154 That was strangely unenjoyable. 497 00:17:01,254 --> 00:17:05,558 Geez, I don't know what to say, Ben. 498 00:17:05,658 --> 00:17:08,228 I was sure I returned this. 499 00:17:08,328 --> 00:17:10,697 You were right, and I was wrong. 500 00:17:10,797 --> 00:17:12,499 This is strangely unenjoyable. 501 00:17:12,599 --> 00:17:13,733 You win. 502 00:17:13,833 --> 00:17:14,967 You are the better man. 503 00:17:18,105 --> 00:17:19,172 Oh, come on, Phil. 504 00:17:19,272 --> 00:17:20,207 Buck up. 505 00:17:20,307 --> 00:17:21,574 We all make mistakes, huh? 506 00:17:21,674 --> 00:17:25,078 Like just last week, I said guilty, and I meant not guilty. 507 00:17:25,178 --> 00:17:27,480 That's mighty big of you to admit. 508 00:17:27,580 --> 00:17:33,120 Well, you know, truth be told, I can I guess on rare occasions 509 00:17:33,220 --> 00:17:34,221 be considered a little-- 510 00:17:34,321 --> 00:17:35,288 Tightass? 511 00:17:35,388 --> 00:17:36,656 Rigid. 512 00:17:36,756 --> 00:17:38,358 Let's go with rigid here. 513 00:17:38,458 --> 00:17:39,426 Wow. 514 00:17:39,526 --> 00:17:40,760 Congratulations. 515 00:17:40,860 --> 00:17:43,230 Ben, you just had a real breakthrough there. 516 00:17:43,330 --> 00:17:44,697 Judith, is there anything that you would 517 00:17:44,797 --> 00:17:46,299 like to share with the group? 518 00:17:46,399 --> 00:17:47,800 I have to go to the bathroom. 519 00:17:47,900 --> 00:17:48,701 Come on, honey. 520 00:17:48,801 --> 00:17:49,602 Dig deeper. 521 00:17:49,702 --> 00:17:50,870 It's fun. - No, no. 522 00:17:50,970 --> 00:17:51,971 It's OK. 523 00:17:52,071 --> 00:17:53,606 I'll share what I've learned. 524 00:17:53,706 --> 00:17:55,408 I should have been more persistent in having 525 00:17:55,508 --> 00:17:56,809 Phil fix that doorknob. 526 00:17:56,909 --> 00:18:00,313 I just was really afraid to turn into a nagging wife like Jud-- 527 00:18:00,413 --> 00:18:01,648 Judas. 528 00:18:01,748 --> 00:18:03,550 You know, I haven't read the Gospels in a while, but-- 529 00:18:03,650 --> 00:18:04,451 Just hold on a minute. 530 00:18:04,551 --> 00:18:05,618 That is not fair. 531 00:18:05,718 --> 00:18:06,719 I do not nag. 532 00:18:06,819 --> 00:18:09,522 And maybe you should think before you speak. 533 00:18:09,622 --> 00:18:13,760 If I've said it once, I've said it 1,000 times-- 534 00:18:13,860 --> 00:18:19,666 oh god, I'm turning into my mother. 535 00:18:19,766 --> 00:18:21,168 Would you just look at us? 536 00:18:21,268 --> 00:18:23,170 We are sitting here acting like children, 537 00:18:23,270 --> 00:18:24,971 while our children are upstairs making 538 00:18:25,071 --> 00:18:27,607 dinner just to mend fences. 539 00:18:27,707 --> 00:18:29,642 Mend fences? 540 00:18:29,742 --> 00:18:32,645 You really drove that one home. 541 00:18:32,745 --> 00:18:34,080 Becoming your mother? 542 00:18:34,181 --> 00:18:35,982 [laughter] 543 00:18:36,082 --> 00:18:38,385 Screw both of you. 544 00:18:38,485 --> 00:18:42,054 I do enjoy a good ironic double entendre. 545 00:18:42,155 --> 00:18:44,591 Well, I don't know about anyone else. 546 00:18:44,691 --> 00:18:46,559 I feel a group hug coming on here. 547 00:18:46,659 --> 00:18:47,460 Absolutely not. 548 00:18:50,763 --> 00:18:53,433 Well, I think what Judith is saying 549 00:18:53,533 --> 00:18:55,868 is that we are uncomfortable with any and all 550 00:18:55,968 --> 00:19:00,240 forms of physical affection. 551 00:19:00,340 --> 00:19:02,275 I do think, though, it might be time for a snack. 552 00:19:09,048 --> 00:19:10,583 Sun's back. 553 00:19:10,683 --> 00:19:13,320 Yeah, great. 554 00:19:13,420 --> 00:19:17,324 Jess, you had more than enough reason to doubt me. 555 00:19:17,424 --> 00:19:19,526 I don't exactly have the best track record. 556 00:19:19,626 --> 00:19:21,027 Which I had to point out like a shrew. 557 00:19:21,127 --> 00:19:21,928 Face it. 558 00:19:22,028 --> 00:19:23,263 I ruined the whole night. 559 00:19:23,363 --> 00:19:24,964 You were right about the ratatouille being too watery. 560 00:19:25,064 --> 00:19:26,933 Your attention to detail is amazing. 561 00:19:27,033 --> 00:19:29,369 But you were aiming high, and I was playing it safe. 562 00:19:29,469 --> 00:19:31,838 But that's why we make a great team. 563 00:19:31,938 --> 00:19:33,172 You know, we complement each other. 564 00:19:33,273 --> 00:19:34,341 We're like-- 565 00:19:34,441 --> 00:19:36,276 Sweet and sour chicken balls? 566 00:19:36,376 --> 00:19:39,646 Uh don't bring the Dragon into this. 567 00:19:39,746 --> 00:19:40,747 Look. 568 00:19:40,847 --> 00:19:43,049 I know that I overreach. 569 00:19:43,149 --> 00:19:45,452 And half the time, or 9 out of 10 times, 570 00:19:45,552 --> 00:19:48,921 or 99 out of 100 times, I fail. 571 00:19:49,021 --> 00:19:52,759 But then-- but then there's that 100th time. 572 00:19:52,859 --> 00:19:55,462 You were one of those. 573 00:19:58,498 --> 00:20:03,270 Me and ratatouille, huh? 574 00:20:03,370 --> 00:20:07,173 I'll take it. 575 00:20:07,274 --> 00:20:09,141 [classical music playing] 576 00:20:09,242 --> 00:20:13,446 Hey, do you smell something burning? 577 00:20:13,546 --> 00:20:15,748 Hmm? 578 00:20:15,848 --> 00:20:16,649 No, no. 579 00:20:16,749 --> 00:20:17,550 My ratatouille. 580 00:20:17,650 --> 00:20:19,786 Do we have a fire extinguisher? 581 00:20:19,886 --> 00:20:20,853 Relax, Tom. 582 00:20:20,953 --> 00:20:24,056 I think there's one in my dad's garage. 583 00:20:24,156 --> 00:20:25,024 Yeah? 584 00:20:25,124 --> 00:20:26,493 OK. 585 00:20:26,593 --> 00:20:30,096 Or we could just do this. 586 00:20:44,110 --> 00:20:45,244 Tommy. 587 00:20:45,345 --> 00:20:47,614 Hi, honey. 588 00:20:47,714 --> 00:20:49,015 Right hand blue. 589 00:20:49,115 --> 00:20:51,518 I don't even wanna know. 590 00:20:51,618 --> 00:20:52,952 [laughter] 591 00:20:54,053 --> 00:20:55,388 Woo. 592 00:20:55,488 --> 00:20:57,357 Your turn. 593 00:20:57,457 --> 00:20:58,825 Mm. 594 00:20:58,925 --> 00:20:59,792 Mm. 595 00:20:59,892 --> 00:21:00,760 So good. 596 00:21:00,860 --> 00:21:02,729 Ah, mm. 597 00:21:02,829 --> 00:21:04,096 Guys, we know it's burnt. 598 00:21:04,196 --> 00:21:07,300 You don't have to pretend to like it. 599 00:21:07,400 --> 00:21:11,137 We were actually hoping tonight would be about you guys 600 00:21:11,237 --> 00:21:12,271 overcoming your differences. 601 00:21:12,372 --> 00:21:15,074 Are you gonna finish that, [inaudible]?? 602 00:21:15,174 --> 00:21:17,777 - Hello? - It hit the spot. 603 00:21:17,877 --> 00:21:19,679 Good food, good wine, good friends. 604 00:21:19,779 --> 00:21:21,147 What more could you ask for? 605 00:21:21,247 --> 00:21:24,183 Hear, hear. 606 00:21:24,283 --> 00:21:28,020 Did you say something? 607 00:21:28,120 --> 00:21:28,988 Nothing. 608 00:21:29,088 --> 00:21:29,922 I'm still hungry. 609 00:21:30,022 --> 00:21:32,925 Is anyone up for some China Dragon? 610 00:21:33,025 --> 00:21:34,260 Mm. 611 00:21:34,361 --> 00:21:35,227 Chicken balls. 612 00:21:35,328 --> 00:21:36,128 No. 613 00:21:36,228 --> 00:21:37,630 I don't eat meat. 614 00:21:37,730 --> 00:21:40,333 That's not what I heard. 615 00:21:40,433 --> 00:21:41,868 [laughter] 616 00:21:41,968 --> 00:21:42,935 [music playing] 617 00:21:43,035 --> 00:21:45,672 MAN (SINGING): Everybody's gotta elevate. 618 00:21:45,772 --> 00:21:46,639 Right on. 619 00:21:46,739 --> 00:21:50,810 Everybody needs a bit of a lift. 620 00:21:50,910 --> 00:21:53,446 Right on. 621 00:21:53,546 --> 00:21:57,249 Well, just as soon as he can, gonna save up some money. 622 00:21:57,350 --> 00:22:00,152 Gonna take himself down to the Tijuana sun. 623 00:22:00,252 --> 00:22:03,823 Burning the sand, he'll come home and do it again. 624 00:22:03,923 --> 00:22:05,057 [inaudible] 625 00:22:05,107 --> 00:22:09,657 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0